The Long Awaited Return

I know I haven't posted in a long time...and I am truely sorry about it. I just have been too busy lately. Work and school is leaving me with no time to play. But I'm not complaining. I chose to do this myself. It keeps me busy and helps me not think about things that I really shouldn't think about. Anyways I finally got a chance to get me some blogger time. SO, I really dont have anything interesting to talk about cause my life is boring. I'll just talk about random news.

Apparently they're using contraceptives to control the geese population in Oregon. This begs the question, "How do they get the geese to put on a condom?"

Oprah Winfrey was turned away at the door of Hermes Paris. Poor poor Oprah! How could they do that to her! If only she could somehow use her $200 million to comfort herself...

Holy crap, this guy really killed a leopard with his bare hands! And he's 73 years old! Well that makes me feel even more useless.

A man got shot in the mouth and then decided that he wanted to take a nap and went home. After waking up, he went to the hospital to have the bullet removed from his tongue.

A 95-year old Japanese man set a new world's record for the 100-meter dash in the 95-99 age group. He came in at 22.04 seconds. Big deal. I could totally smoke his ass.

Let me be a testimonial for the power of prayer. I've been praying ever since "The Beach" for DiCaprio to be hit in the head by a bottle. And finally God has answered my prayers.